Do You Have The Right People Around You?

Sorround yourself

Not having the right people around you can stunt your growth as an individual. Your circle of friends is a reflection of who you are. A wise man once said: “The worst part of success is trying to find someone who’s happy for you”. Do you have the right people around you? Do they want to see you be great the same way you want them to be great?

We live in a time where we as humans can be very antisocial. We allow whomever gravitates towards us, into our lives and just let it be. You figure since they seem cool, why not? We miss out on opportunities to meet amazing people because we tolerate whomever walks into our lives and figure we don’t need to look for friends. Although I feel everything happens for a reason — whether meeting people or growing apart, Don’t be afraid to be the reason for things happening. Don’t be afraid of stepping outside of your comfort zone and putting yourself out there, getting to know new people! New GOOD people. Being around people who genuinely accept you for you.

Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friend’s success. – Oscar Wilde

If you consider yourself to be a very hard working person, you’ll often come across people are just around for the ride. Beware of these people. They love to show up in the shadows of your success. What are your they doing? Are they bettering themselves for the future? What are you getting out of your friendship with them? When I say this, I don’t mean anything materialistic or tangible. I mean morally. Do you consider them your rock, just as they consider you theirs? Would they ride or die for you just as you would them? One sided friendships are the worst. However, this happens successfully when opposites attract.  If you consider yourself to be a giving and trusting person, almost selfless — don’t be surprised if you attract selfish people who have absolutely no problem receiving.  It’s up to you, to decided whether or not this is tolerable any longer.

We’re human. It weighs on you when you indirectly take on the role as the constant. But that’s because you have something to offer this world. By not being around the right people to help cultivate that, you remain stagnant. I’m not saying you need to depend on your friends in regards to your success. I’m saying with the right team or circle, you can accomplish many things outside of your own drive, ambition and determination.

According this lovely article I found written by Friendship Expert Cherie Burbach, “Friendships can benefit you in lifting your self-esteem, encouraging you to live healthier, or even just elevating the quality of your life. Your friends should lift you up and help you to be the best person you can be.”

There’s no such thing as a perfect friendship. People fuck up organically, it happens! As friends, the both of your duties are to make sure neither one of you falls off, and bring the best out of each other. Being in a friendship with someone who is only committed to the friendship when it benefits them is toxic. You can consider yourself to be a great judge of character, but don’t be blinded by people who reel themselves in by appearing to have your best interests at heart. They don’t. They’re simply wolves in sheep clothing looking to mooch off of anything that is beneficial to them.

“No new friends” . . .this statement is often quoted, recited, and sung. However, if your circle consists of lazy, uninspired leeches. You need new friends. Oprah once said: ‘surround yourself with people who only lift you higher’. She was spot on! Positivity is contagious! Once you start hanging around people who have a positive outlook in life and are determined to make their dreams reality, that rubs off on you. In turn, vice versa!

Open your eyes. Don’t get played. Choose wisely. Be sure to surround yourself with people with a similar or positive mind set like you do! 🙂

  • Great read! I think it’s important to be very mindful of who you spend time with and tell your dreams to. The Bible says that bad communication disrupts good manners. Love this!

    Jas | Jasmine Diane

    • Amen! Thank you so much for dropping that line of wisdom! That is so accurate.

  • Whitlie

    This hit so close to home! I needed to read this.

    • Glad I was able to connect to you in that way! =]

  • Laura

    Thanks to you, I need to reevaluate my life. LOL.

    • Not just you girl! All of us do

    • imani

      don’t worry Laura you aren’t alone

  • imani

    This write up is so spot on. I feel as though i allow people too much time to fester in my presence and i have to get better with that but i m definitely ready to drop some metaphorical dead weight for this summer weather in route to nyc soon (hopefully I’m tired of being col *insert sad face**) Thanks Chrissie ….Spring cleaning is real in these streets

  • Great post! I have a very small circle of people around me about 95% family because it’s hard to meet people whom have your best interest in mind.

    • Likewise! I’ve learned the hard way that unfortunately, people won’t always have your best interests at heart. And sometimes the only reason they stick around is because they have some type of hidden agenda.